learnteach: (kissing)
I've been in a slump.   There's a whole buncha stuff going on (or not going on) in my life that I don't talk about much here for various reasons.  So, I've been unmotivated towards the good.   But right now, I feel very motivated.

Amazing what a little anger can do for you.
The idea of a "Bucket List" is very interesting, and a good way to ask yourself what you should do next--why wait until you're about to kick the bucket?   Kick it with your ideas and dreams right now.   I've been doing this for a while, though, so I have traveled the world, gone to cooking school in France, traveled the US on a motorcycle, watched a friend carry the Olympic flame, done an ironbutt ride, learned a martial art, won a tournament, etc. etc.

But it's the negative motivation that really can get me moving.   Right now, the situations going on require a lot of presence and patience, and waiting for change to occur.  I have very little control between the constraints of other people's time and energy, and my own conviction that being there, face to face, to lend support and ideas, is very very important.  Thus the clusterfun this morning, where I blew off a church commitment (and isn't that one you should keep!) to wait to be irritated, to meet to have a discussion I had already had, to try and include people who hadn't been present.

I can't be having this.  (Granny Weatherwax mode.)  I may not be able to decide how the world will be, but I can certainly put some elbow grease into how it's not going to be.  

And that breaks the inertia.  There are things that MUST BE DONE.  These things are very, very clear, and take up the top 5 slots on the TO DO list.   No excuses.   No problems.   If I have to reach into a fire, I will.

Of course, I don't have to reach into a fire.  Just either fix a car (and thanks to those who have offered to loan their vehicles) or survive motorcycling in the rain.  It's warm at 50 degrees, compared to Indiana.  And the new wool pants don't lose their crease, so that's cool.   There are times when I am thankful for fat ankles.

So, the top five list (in flux, and no particular order):
1. Clean up the environment I live in, so I can react quickly, and not bog down in my own distractions.  Get Rid Of Stuff.
2.  Contact  people more with presence; don't just read their livejournals, call them up.  Cook them fondue.  Wash their cars .*
3. Get back involved with volunteering.
4. Get a job that pays some money; do any other jobs with complete passion.
5. Be there for these situations (which I am not elaborating on.)  This will require a lot of flexibility.  And fixing some wheels, because mountain passes and February and motorcycles just don't mix.

Ok, off to stomp on some things. 


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