3 days left!

[learnteach]

And then done!

It's funny. It shouldn't affect me this much, but having to deal with the rage and stupidity continuously is very unsettling. Sleep patterns all disrupted. Think I've shed the rage, then some act of petty stupidity just brings it right back, and I get exhausted suppressing it. I dread going in to deal with it.

Wow, it's somewhat amazing. Even direct requests are now blithely ignored--all over relatively mindless, minor things (what route to follow in the building, how to handle snack issues, what students are allowed to do and not do) and classroom discipline is gone out the window. Of course, the minor attempted discussion at repair--met with sort of a blank insoucence (sp); a "whatever, why are you so anal about your way" attitude.

The other school called and confirmed no job for next year. Working tech is sounding better and better.

Comments

two cents. well, maybe five....

[katie-in-london.livejournal.com]

It shouldn't effect you so much? If it didn't I'd be super worried....

I realized this phenomenon (granted, to a lesser extent!) while subbing: it is easy to get so beat down by all the issues and questions and stress that one starts ignoring the little stuff. I could perceive, at least within my own personality, where this would lead. (ie: slowly the "little" stuff would become bigger and bigger stuff) And so I understand much of the difficulty behind teaching and why teachers sometimes don't (or won't!) give 110% when (I staunchly believe) they SHOULD. It's just too exhausting. It's the "Pick Your Battles" argument. But it's also a "Been Beat Down, Don't Have the Energy" phenomenon.

If you stick with teaching, more power to you! But if it comes down to teaching OR taking care of yourself (mentally, emotionally, spiritually) YOU are the most important one. The kids will find their way, reguardless.

I think you're the bomb for going this far.

[beanolc.livejournal.com]

I have to admit that I am very sorry you have come to this point so soon, but am also glad that you recognize it. It is much better to do this now than after the credential program ($) and the years. We can talk any time you want to about this, but you sound to be at the point I know all too well, and why I am no longer a teacher.

For the record, and for what it's worth, the kids kept me in the job longer than I would have stayed otherwise. They were the best part of my job.

You did amazing work, and there's no shame in moving on. You have done more than most people can ever claim.

[beanolc.livejournal.com]

note: I am sorry only because there can be so much joy in a classroom, and I'm pissed as all get out that they drove out another one.

[katie-in-london.livejournal.com]

The sadest part is, they (I guess they=the beaurocrasy?) are very good at driving out the inteeligent ones, the ones who really WANT to make a difference. I saw so many 'tenured' teachers in my time subbing who were only they're for the money (and, um, what the heck is that rational about anyway?!)

Thoughts on why the 'Good'ones are driven out? cuz it makes me sad....

[marysdress.livejournal.com]

When I was still shiny new and considering taking up teaching, I sat in with some old teachers of mine. One of them, the terror of the school, gave me sets of index cards to grade. They were for term papers, ostensibly assembled by the best and brightest if they were taking his class. He told me to check that each student had a subject that could be proven (Not Mark Twain was the greatest American writer for instance) and three real sources in bibliographical form. It was appalling.

He did it on purpose to make sure I knew what I was getting into. As you know, I didn't become a teacher. I think I would have been one of the good ones, but his attitude toward the job worried me almost as much as their inability to execute that task.